Achievements & Milestones
Track your progress. Unlock absurd glory. Flaunt it quietly.
Hydration Hero
Log 2.5L for 7 days straight.
The Manager Whisperer
Escalate 3 logs in Karen Mode.
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Track better. Live smarter.
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Choose a theme and start your personalised AI chat.
Copy the prompt, then launch ChatGPT or Copilot.
If Copilot rejects the prompt on the first paste, just try again—
Copilot is shy like that.
Track your progress. Unlock absurd glory. Flaunt it quietly.
Log 2.5L for 7 days straight.
Escalate 3 logs in Karen Mode.
???
Logitmate is a satirical health companion. It helps you track habits, dodge guilt, and laugh at your hydration decisions — all while AI themes comment on your behaviour.
Explore unique personalities that audit your life: Cosmic Audit Mode, Karen Mode, Dad Joke Mode, and Bureaucratic Emotion Inspector. More on the way...
Steve Hyde is a tech veteran, mental health advocate, and long-time tinkerer who’s been building things since the internet had a dial tone. He founded Northants Computers over 29 years ago, but Logitmate is his most personal project yet.
In 2024, at 59 years old, Steve made the call to quit smoking and take his health seriously. This time, it wasn’t about cold turkey or guilt—it was about curiosity. He wanted to understand the immediate and long-term benefits of quitting. So he started tracking thoughts, urges, and small victories in real time. It wasn’t just working—it was life-altering.
That simple self-reflection evolved into tracking food, hydration, sleep… eventually everything. But rather than build a sterile health app, Steve designed a companion—one that celebrates progress, forgives setbacks, and occasionally delivers a dad joke when you need it most.
“I didn’t want another app telling me I’d failed. I wanted one that knew I was still trying. That’s what Logitmate is about.” – Steve
Logitmate is built on Steve’s belief that health isn’t a linear journey—it’s messy, human, and worth honouring. His mission? To help others find comfort and progress in the chaos. No judgment. No perfection. Just a weirdly enjoyable way to keep trying.
In the end, Steve just wanted to make a Logitmate attempt at helping people — with data, with empathy, and, where necessary, with puns.
Want to shape future theme packs? Submit ideas, test prompts, or just vibe along for the absurd ride. Logitmate is evolving — and you’re invited.
Logitmate started as a simple way to track habits with humour, but it's evolving into a full ecosystem — one that turns health, effort, and self-awareness into something engaging, motivating, and strangely enjoyable.
Every part of Logitmate — from theme packs to prompt logic — is modular by design. That means it scales with your life, not against it. You can add themes, achievements, or narrative layers without rewriting the system.
From logging your first litre of water to running a 5K, Logitmate turns real-world actions into digital rewards. Badges, lore, humour — and yes, the occasional absurd title like "Knight of the Weighing Table."
At its core, Logitmate is both a parody and a companion. It celebrates your wins, pokes fun at your missteps, and keeps showing up — just like you do.
This isn’t just a tracking app. It’s a story engine, a satire machine, and a surprisingly loyal sidekick. Welcome to the long game.
It reframes behaviour change into a story people want to participate in.
It replaces shame with satire, pressure with play.
It’s built on the idea that absurdity and sincerity aren’t opposites — they’re allies in making self-improvement truly human.
AI: Form-72B
You: Emotional Claimant
AI: Karen
You: Valued Consumer
AI: DadBot-5000
You: Sport / Champ / Big Tuna
AI: The Auditor
You: Simulant
AI: The Chronicler
You: Knight of the Weighing Table
AI: The Don
You: The Best One
AI: Uncle Joe
You: You Know, The Guy
AI: Sir Montague
You: Shrubbery Seeker